Note: This is a work of satire but please do take it very seriously.
In a startling revelation, PCB chairman Ehsan Mani said that the Pindi Cricket Stadium is actually a Golf Course, while hiding his face behind a steel-plated curtain in his rented home.
“Actually, we only play cricket when we find it empty and when the big boys are not around,” said Mani while marking himself safe on Facebook.
When asked how they will play the scheduled test match against Sri Lanka, he said that they have made appropriate arrangements.
“Look, me and Wasim Khan will sleep outside the stadium and run in the ground with bat and ball, before anyone comes in. I have borrowed the container from 2014 dharna, while Wasim has the one from the latest dharna. Lucky boy. Plus, they don’t like playing golf in wintertime, early in the morning,” added the former ICC chairman.
When asked who actually owns the land, he replied by altering the lines of a famous Noor Jahan song.
“Mujhse muskil sawalaon k jawab meray journalist na mang
Ab bhi dilkash hai stadium ka husn magar kya kejaay
Or bhi dukh hai zamanay mai zameen k siwa”
After completing this line, he went inside his bedroom and hid under the bed as the journalist started their feast.